So long, so long

And so ends summer. I called off work today, and, frankly, I don't give a damn. Points for pop culture reference? Anyone?

I believe I am actually going to get to attend a pool party today, and that makes me the happiest girl in the world. Really, it does. All I've wanted to do all summer was go swimming, and I never got a chance to. The one time I even wore my bathing suit was only to go to HersheyPark with my ex-boyfriend to see Billy Joel. We got into the park on discounted tickets and we went to East Coast Waterworks and splashed around like little kids. However, I do not feel this actually qualifies as swimming. Thus, today shall be a grand day. ...Despite the fact that I immediately become a five year old when I am anywhere around a pool or medium to large-sized bodies of water, and I'm pretty sure this is supposed to be a grown-up party in some way, shape, or form. Fabulous.

And it is also a Sunday which means it is PostSecret Day. If you have never been to PostSecret, you totally should do so right now. If you are reading this, just click the linky on the left side of my page. Check it out. Amazing. Anyway, normally at least one or two secrets really speak to me or make me go all instrospective, but, today, two of them (in succession) slapped me in the face, haha. I almost thought that I got drunk or blacked out and made and mailed these postcards in to that blog. Love it.

And I will leave under the cover
Of summer's kiss upon the sky
Like the stone face of your lover
Just before she says goodbye
I was certain that the season could be held between my arms
Well just as summer's hold is fleeting
I was here but now I'm gone...

Nobody likes you when you're 23...

I think I may have had an excellent birthday and birthday celebration despite the fact that it will always be remembered by me as the first time I ever got sick from drinking. Damnit.

in time of daffodils

in time of daffodils(who know
the goal of living is to grow)
forgetting why,remember how

in time of lilacs who proclaim
the aim of waking is to dream,
remember so(forgetting seem)

in time of roses(who amaze
our now and here with paradise)
forgetting if,remember yes

in time of all sweet things beyond
whatever mind may comprehend,
remember seek(forgetting find)

and in a mystery to be
(when time from time shall set us free)
forgetting me,remember me

-e e cummings

I'm not sure what color my text is actually supposed to be, but I rather like this aqua-ish color that I have chosen in its place. I am in love with that poem. We're doing a setting of it in RDC for the fall concert. To be fair, I'm in love with a lot of things lately. It's pretty cool.T

Sometimes that's just what we need to get us through the day.

breathe1symphony (10:43:37 PM): i can find something to love about every season

breathe1symphony (10:44:21 PM): but i love sweaters and dark colors and the smell of wood burning and red cheeks and cold noses and leaves and cider and everything that may or may not be stereotypical about fall.

M (10:46:15 PM): ahh, i can only imagine the intense soul melting cuteness you probably drip of when you have red cheeks and nose

M (10:46:16 PM): can't wait

So much, so much...

I don't even know where to begin; I just feel like getting a million and one thoughts out on a computer screen. I love the way my thoughts flow into words against my kooky polka dotted background. I love to hear the sound of my fingertips tapping on my laptop keys. That sound is just so satisfying. That sound should drive me to write my first piece of Young Adult fiction.

I'm sitting at the dining room table in my house-which-no-longer-feels-quite-like-home, and the puppies are finally asleep. I can hear my grandmother complaining about her stomach from her room. I can feel my elbows digging into the arms of one of the many mismatched chairs that exist around the table. On the table next to me, two pieces of opened mail confirm that I am destined for bigger and better things than this blog, the Great Wolf Lodge, and my own lowered and lazy expectations for myself.

In the midst of a terribly funny moment featuring my mother on speaker phone explaining to my Michael the reasoning behind her putting me on one of those kiddie leashes when I was younger, my mother told me that my child abuse clearance and a letter in a Wilkes envelope had arrived in the mail. I couldn't be happier. These are the two things, the two positive signs, that I needed to prove to myself and the world that I am ready to be a teacher again. The child abuse clearance is standard, but the letter of recommendation that I received from one of my Ed professors is probably the nicest and truest description of myself that I have ever read. I need to include some of this letter here, due in part to the fact that I am under the impression that this woman knows me better than I know myself:

"...Furthermore, Ms. Ferrantino demonstrated, through all her work and interpersonal interactions, a unique sense of humor that was always appropriate and highly creative, but never derogatory or negative. Her humor lifts morale and engages those around her, whether students or colleagues. She has a joyful approach to education that will flourish in the proper environment and will benefit her students greatly. As a young professional, she shows much promise."

For those of you who know me as someone other than a faceless blog, you know that this is me. I can't think of a better way to verbalize my aspirations for and attitudes towards teaching. Reading the way I am presented on this piece of paper makes me more determined than I have ever been to succeed at this career choice, this life-calling.

A bunch of other stuff happened recently, but it was so not that important. Tee-hee.

It's getting better all the time.

I just got out of the shower, and I am sitting in my bed in my general underthings, and I am listening to the Ting Tings. This is the type of music that makes me want to dance around in my general underthings while perhaps drinking a glass of wine. Big ups to Mary Rose. I am also apparently taking a few moments from what will inevitably be a busy day to ruminate about my day. My bowl of Kix is getting soggy as I type.

I actually had a pretty solid day at work yesterday. All of that shit is coming back to me. It just took a little longer than I would have liked. I still need some direction, but I've remastered some of the computer systems, so that will make everything a bit easier. And I only have to work there four hours this morning, so, go me.

Following this lovely work day, I came home and got changed. I did indeed put on "walking shoes." Unlike a lot of people, my flip flops are my walking shoes. I can walk ridiculously far distances in flip flops, but I doubt that many people could figuratively walk a mile in my flip flops...

Anyway, I went over to boyfriend's for a pre-birthday celebration as we will not get to spend any part of my actual birthday together. He definitely got me some of the most awesome presents I have ever received, including a book titled American Nerd, a mix cd of sorts, and a relaxation tub caddy for when I take baths. It holds a book, a glass of wine, and a candle. He took me out for a rather pleasant dinner, and we came back to my apartment and watched some Home Improvement and drank more with my roommates. Not quite an evening for the record books, but a nice one nonetheless.

Now I'm exhausted because I never really feel like I sleep enough after consuming any amount of alcohol, and I have to get ready to go to work. I really don't feel like working twice today. That's my own fault, I suppose. I think I'll be ok to ignore the general bullshit that seems to want to stare me down at the one job. As long as I'm happy, who gives a crap what anybody else thinks. Right?

This blog was supposed to be different.

This was supposed to be the "grown-up" blog. This was not supposed to be my whiny, emo, angst-ridden livejournal. Old habits die hard.

So, I started my new old job last night. I was spazzing for a brief period of time because I have literally forgotten everything I ever knew about working there. However, as the night went on, I began to pick up on all the minutiae I'd forgotten, and things got better, easier.

Today was another story. It's a busy time at the store. I was kicking ass the first few hours. I was even having a pretty good time working there. I can't say that I ever really had a good time working there during my first tour of duty there. And then the drama started. I was supposed to be Chris' no drama buddy, but drama seems to follow me wherever I go. Chris told me it wasn't my fault; I'm merely a victim of the drama.

Thus, without airing all of my dirty laundry for the entire internet to peruse, I have pretty much given the reason behind what will be my early departure from this employment venture. I really don't need the pittance they're paying me, and I certainly do not need the aggravation. I would say it was nice while it lasted, but the nice lasted less long than the actual job itself.

And so much has happened since I decided to start this "Grown-Up" blog...

I think I may have to give a brief rundown of the events of my existence for the masses that obviously read this.

That stable, happy relationship that I was in at the time of posting of the last entry? Yeah, that ended approximately two weeks after that post. The cool thing is, we're still a huge part of each other's lives and great friends. This is the first time that that has ever really happened to me, and I think this has a definite impact on my current state of being.

I suppose you could say that I dated around for a bit after that, but I'm very pleased with where I've ended up. I'm seeing a wonderful guy, and as of right now, that's all I care to say about that. I'm sure I will elaborate on this fact in the future.

My best friend moved to South Korea for a year. I admire her guts more than anything in this world. I wish I could be like her. There is a chance that I will get that opportunity in the coming school year. Apparently this post is like a teaser trailer for my upcoming life?

I was promoted at the Lodge. I'm the MagiQuest supervisor. The only truly exciting thing to come of this is that I finally got a new costume. This new princess get-up still does not fit. And really, I'm no princess.

I want to get back into teaching more than I can possibly say. I'm tired of dicking around; I want to start (re-start?) my career. The fact that I'm going back to one of my old jobs on my days off from the Lodge probably will not help facilitate this. But this new (old?) retail extension of my existence could provide for some fun and exciting blog fodder.

I'm going to wrap up this recap by stating that Nikki Nulton will probably forever be tied to my blogging habits in one way or another.